Tuesday, August 15, 2006
How Ben Canney Almost Killed Me
WARNING THE FOLLOWING STORY IS NOT FOR EVERYONE IT MAY 'CAUSE YOU TO RUN SCREAMING FROM THE ROOM!
It started yesterday. I had a very important phone call to make and when I made it I ended up getting through to an answering machine. I left my name and number because this organization I called promised they would call me right back. So I waited for them to call. I waited and waited and no call came. At that point I decided I would risk it and take a shower in hopes they wouldn't call while I was upstairs in the bathroom. Sure enough about 3 minutes into my shower I hear the phone ring and so I immediately sprinted down the stairs (sans vetements) to try to catch the call before my answering machine picked it up on the fourth ring. I was doing very well until I hit the kitchen floor which was in the words of Bon Jovi "slippery when wet" (on an aside I should have remembered that as last Winter after having a water fight with Heidi B. I rushed out to the kitchen losing my balance and slid knee first into the corner of the cupboard. Lots of blood but I survived to go for a hike the same night) Any ways when my feet hit the kitchen floor they immediately flew out from under me and I landed on my back and head. My momentum and wet back carried me accross the floor and I slid into my kitchen table breaking off a leg (it has broken before) and sending the whole table hard into the wall. Even though I lost consciousness briefly (from landing on my head) I know the impact was very hard as somehow the table hitting the wall dislodged the phone and it was lying on the floor with someone talking on the other end. When I came to I could hear a voice and I crawled over to the phone and said hello. Sure enough it was Ben Canney. Obviously he knew I was waiting for an important call and called when he did to try to kill me. At least that was what ran through my head as I lay naked on my kitchen floor. Ben I will not forget this. I will have my day, mark my words.
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